Hunting Season pt 1

Magical

This years hunt

was magical

it took place on new trails

that coated in white fluff

literally a winterwonderland

This year our hunters had

more options

saw more

and seemed more excited..

This year

was a little …

Magical.

Besties

After a great time at Summer Camp

Princess came home with her Bestie Billie

They had nearly a week to just hang out at the farm..

to go to the beach and do things like 

every teen aged girl would do.

pick up litter off the grounds

dump out the old cans and bottles of beer and soda's they found

leaving the beach CLEAN

and beautiful

and putting everything in the proper recycle container 

I confess…

 I LOVE these girls!

They are SO fun to be around

they are nature girls

ALL THE WAY!

it was a nice week for them,

and for ME.

I sure missed my girlie while she was OFF

white water rafting,

working on COPE 

working on her hipline

and getting trained in ATV

not to mention horseback riding

coming back meant hitting some favorite places

and being silly!

it meant being utterly harassed by little brothers

and long chats

because that is what great friends do..

we LOVE Billie

and hope she gets back to the farm soon

Small Towns..

Blessings Farm 

is JUST outside a small SMALL town

and just a few more miles from a 

normal sized "small town"..

I HAVE these variations in "small"

because I am NOT from a small town community.

always 

and I mean ALWAYS

I have dreamed of living in a small town..

I like cities

and I like the country

I have lived in both..

but Mostly I live in a place

that is NEITHER..

it's something in between…

right now..

I am missing 

my small towns..

my small town community…

but I am learning

to be SO thankful for where ever

God places me EACH day

contentment

it seems is a lesson that I still need to own.

this summer we had a lot of great days..

but this one in particular

brings back wonderful memories

I adore the murals on the sides of some of these buildings 

I love the blue blue sky

the green of the trees

and the reflection in the windows..

NOT to mention

the shadows

I love the contrast of two OLD buildings

literally smashed next to one another

modern art

woodland art just on the side of a building

jutting out

and needing to be noticed

and VIBRANT colors!

I LOVE our small town COLORS

back alleys

back parking spaces

and the drive BACK to the farm..

it was a great day..

and great days..

deserve to be remembered..

cherished.

they are precious, and beautiful..

do you have any special days that you remember from this summer?

days that bring YOU comfort

and joy

and make you smile to yourself?

Tuesday is coming

Tuesday is coming..

and it has me thinking...

there were these great thundering storms this summer

that brought in 

these evenings of color

I love vibrant colors.. 

I hate some of these photos

they are NOT as crisp as they used to be

Moriarty is messing with my EYE

but I enjoyed the nights all the same..

evenings of dramatic sounds and sights..

thunder and light shows...

evenings on the porch

reminiscing 

thinking 

pondering

discussing

Life's big thoughts

with all my very favorite people..

(were you there?)

these nights brought deep sleeps for me

(I don't sleep well in the "city")

and 

somewhere lately

someplace 

between 

sleeping and waking

 I feel my heart breaking

from my journal...

October 13

"I don't know if Moriarty is just messing with me.. but

I do believe it's in the place between waking and sleeping, where dreams still drift, wafting and waning...that their memories somehow still live most vibrantly.. because I heard her voice, so bold and clear... and woke up weeping when I realized she wasn't in the room with me.. missing mom today…"

that happens a lot lately..

this vibrant memory thing..

the feeling of mom

or dad

BEING with me

smelling them

or sensing one of them..

hearing them..

in the time in between..

not really knowing in that place in space

who is still HERE and who has gone on …

waking

and my heart breaking

all over again..

and then

I look in the mirror

and say

"suck it up buttercup".

this morning

as I woke up, 

thoughts of my own mortality covered me like a blanket

enveloped me..

almost smothering me

Moriarty is messing with my mind

but MY GOD is so much bigger than

this little tumor in my brain

messing with my sight

messing with my memory

messing with my waking and sleeping

and I am thankful for being alive

and

HOME

with

lights on

cups of hot tea;

blankets that are knit and comfy

and laughter loud and vibrant…

music and pumpkins carved and glowing..

Tuesday is coming

Naughty Autumn Deliciousness

Autumn Deliciousness

makes my heart go pitter patter...

the Doctor wants me to cut out ALL gluten

and nearly ALL sugar

and I think that is just lovely..

and that I will start probably on November 5th or 6th..

but..

don't tell him.

He might tell Santa

and then the word will be out

about MY being naughty.

Seriously

who can resist CANDY Apples?

Catching My Eye

I have learned in the past month,

that I have a brain tumor

It's wrapped itself around my optic nerve

and I am having a procedure to hopefully 

kill it..

because the chance of blindness increases

if I choose 

to do nothing..

I have always 

ALWAYS told my children

that doing NOTHING

is doing something

so make sure you CHOSE to do that.

I don't believe we should just LET life happen.

I feel strongly we should EMBRACE life

really LIVE it.

I don't by ANY means think we should try to control it.

But we should by all means OWN it..

it's OUR life

a GIFT from God after all

and we only GET one of them.

we each walk roads…

they take us places…

onward to adventures,

back to home and family and friends…

sometimes we walk trails

or paths

or highways

or meandering country roads..

but life is a journey

and walk on I will

ever following after my Savior...

The procedure I am having is called a "Gamma Knife"

It is a little scary.

but there are scarier procedures..

Buddy asked if I was scared..

when I think of all the things that could happen IF I just..

ignore this..

just do nothing..

it's honestly a LOT scarier..

so I don't know who first said the quote..

but I like it

"You have to WANT IT more than you are AFRAID OF IT"

and that seems to fit here…

I want this treatment

because of what it CAN do

more than I am afraid of it..

I WANT the hope

MORE than I am afraid of this Tumor

I want LIFE

more than I am afraid of all its rawness

all is pain.

I Want to SEE these views again

and again

I want to look out on the beauty of God's Creation

and give thanks

for EVERY thing

the good, the bad

the ugly..

because its LIFE

and LIFE can be raw

and messy

and painfully real

and in it's ruggedness

it's beautiful

and I am thankful.

thankful for the air I breath..

the love of family and friends

and of CHRIST JESUS

who's love

saved me from the sin that is me…

I am SO thankful

and am trying to drink it all in

Farm Art d/Tour

Near our Farm each Year in the Autumn

is held something called

Farm Art dTour

at the same time as a Fermentation Fest..

It's just FABULOUS

This year

MY FAVORITE spot was this one

the detail of this art work was immense

it fit my imaginings of the Shire

or NARNIA

as I often refer to this land

this particular spot made me think of the 

White Witch

and her Winter nightmare land

I could IMAGINE 

her sitting upon this throne

could you?

it is so beautiful

surrounded in mirrors

so icy

so cold looking

even the deer

were stunning

and solid

oh I love the creativity of these people!

BRAVO!

just..

really really really

they mean it when they say

DO NOT TOUCH

ha!